Hey i’m Harriet,
and I specialise in supporting adult children who grew up within a dysfunctional family system to better understand the impact of their childhood and feel more secure in themselves and their relationships.
I can help you to overcome anxiety, insecurities and self doubt which are impacting your wellbeing, relationships and work.
Many of my clients are overachievers who come to me after spending years listening to podcasts and reading self-help books with little meaningful change. The problem with this is it doesn’t resolve the root causes of your present difficulties, and it keeps you stuck trying to figure it all out on your own, which for many is a repeat of their childhood story.
If you grew up in a family where love had to be earned, emotions were dismissed, your needs were overlooked or you felt responsible for keeping everyone else happy, it makes sense that you’ve developed ways of coping to try and protect yourself.
Maybe you got the message that you were too much, difficult or somehow responsible when things went wrong in the family. So maybe you internalised the belief that you’re not good enough and tried to compensate by achieving more, pleasing others or being endlessly self-reliant. Except healing doesn’t happen by doing more, and it can’t in isolation.
Healing happens in a safe, supportive relationship.
We all need people. If you have been hurt in relationship then you also need the opportunity to heal in relationship.
I can help.
my approach
I am an integrative therapist with a relational-developmental focus. I hold a compassionate, trauma-informed perspective in which I see current struggles or problems in relationships as outdated survival strategies which were needed in earlier times in your life. For example, you may have difficulty setting boundaries, struggle to trust others or avoid conflict. Often this is because as a child your early developmental needs to be heard, supported and cared for were not sufficiently met.
I believe that in developing a safe and trusting relationship, what happens between us in the therapy together can offer insight and healing opportunities to work through the issues which also happen ‘out there’ in your life.
For example, in expressing your feelings and needs in therapy and having these be heard, understood and met with warmth, consistency and love can offer a new, reparative experience of being in relationship which can help to heal negative past experiences by getting what didn’t get back then and supporting you to practice safe intimacy and connection with me, so you can then experience it with others.
We are a team.
I’m not a therapist who will sit there in silence and nod while you pour your heart out! Two of us are in the relationship, and so I see therapy as a collaborative process. The content of session is dictated by what you want to bring, however I will respond in a directive way to encourage further exploration of these issues and offer challenge when needed. I’m straight talking, swear sometimes and show up as myself - not in a role. I also encourage you to bring your authentic, messy, imperfect self without having to know what you need or be ‘put together’.
my qualifications
PGDip Counselling & Psychotherapy - University of Leeds
BSc Psychology (First Class Hons) - Nottingham Trent University
Level 3 Certificate in Counselling Skills
Level 2 Award in Counselling Concepts
professional development
I am committed to regularly updating my skills and knowledge; engaging in Continuing Professional Development through reading, research and additional training.
I also attend supervision regularly and engage in my own personal therapy.
professional membership
I am a registered member of the British Association of Counselling and Psychotherapy (MBACP) and follow their ethical framework.
work with me
